Talking to family about Credit cards.

For just about anything you want to get off your chest about credit cards.
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Vermonster
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Talking to family about Credit cards.

Postby Vermonster » Thu Oct 08, 2015 8:51 am

I find it very tough to talk to my parents about credit cards. My mom was chased by Discover for a year, then by a collections agency for not paying the credit card. I know her credit score is terrible. She uses a Target Redcard for all shopping now. Interest rate is in the high 20's and she always has a balance. She sees my Amex and tells me to "be careful, you have to pay that every month."

They have never been "financially savvy" people, and banks always push them around. My dad has a BoA Americard that he opened over 30 years ago. BoA was very keen on keeping it as a no rewards high interest card. When he asked to change to a rewards card they told him he would have to close it and open a new one. Thankfully he was very attached to his 30+ year card. A few days later he received a new card in the mail, with a letter explaining the rewards system. Not that it really matters as he doesn't ever do online banking, and probably wipes out any rewards with interest.


I'm trying to help my brother out a little. He is living at home, college grad, waiting tables. He makes a boat load of cash and shoves it in a savings account. I think he has $25k in loans left and pays for everything with a debit card. He has no car, no rent, no insurance, ect. My parents aren't the best influence so I have been trying to help him out, explaining things and sending him information about cards. He is interested but hasn't taken the next step.

So what have your experiences been?
Chase Freedom $9k~~Chase Sapphire Preferred $6.5k~~Amex Blue Cash Preferred $12.4k~~Citi Double Cash $4.7k


JonE
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Re: Talking to family about Credit cards.

Postby JonE » Thu Oct 08, 2015 2:48 pm

Everyone in my family is flat ass broke, and has had horrible experiences with credit. A few relatives hit a good patch in the credit world, applied for 5-6 different cards, racked up balances, and are now in a Money Management program paying all the balances off.

I've had better luck than anyone in the family, 3 credit cards, a new car loan, and paying down balances. I'd like to get 2-3 more cards and maybe drop one or two current ones, then stop there.
Wallet: Chase Freedom, Discover IT
Chopping Block: Synchrony
Future: TBD

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kcm7
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Re: Talking to family about Credit cards.

Postby kcm7 » Thu Oct 08, 2015 3:40 pm

They say: "OK so you got a free flight from a credit card, but how much interest did you pay? That flight wasn't really free because you had to pay interest."

I say: "I pay on time or early, so I didn't pay a cent of interest."

They literally cannot fathom having a card and not paying interest. I suppose it's best, then, that they're credit card-averse.
Cards:

-Capital One Quicksilver
-Barclaycard Arrival (no AF)
- US Bank (no rewards)
-IHG

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CarefulBuilder14
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Re: Talking to family about Credit cards.

Postby CarefulBuilder14 » Thu Oct 08, 2015 3:47 pm

My big family mostly has PIF-ers with just a few prime cards for simplicity, as well as some rebuilders. The rebuilders don't like to talk about their money problems, though they have been numerous and varied.

A few are small-time rewards aficionados. I've heard one say a $100 store credit was a great signup bonus, and another boast that his AARP card earned 3% cash on travel. They think it's weird that I have so many cards, and I used get "Costanza wallet" jokes (until it got old).

But when we go out to eat together, they're happy to pay me their share in cash and let me rack up big rewards. :D One person occasionally fights me on this, though, since she flies a lot and likes upgrades. I'm not totally sure of what card/airline combo she's using right now, but we trade off on who gets the reward points from the cash crowd.
Love: IHG, Platinum, Sallie Mae, AA Plat, CSP
Like: Discover, ED, BCE, Hyatt, Arrival, Freedom
Might drop: BrooksBros, Prestige (Costco PC?)
Might add: Proper business card, CSR, Ritz, Delta Gold
Letting new accounts cool off since May
Really not sure what I'll add next or when

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Vattené
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Re: Talking to family about Credit cards.

Postby Vattené » Thu Oct 08, 2015 6:00 pm

My parents are very financially responsible, and conservative. I don't think they've ever financed a car - always save up beforehand and pay cash. I'd like to get to that point someday, but I did finance a car about a year and a half ago. They have a high aversion to credit cards, too. I've tried to explain the benefits, since I know they'd be the type to always PIF, but they'll have none of it.
-Vattené
FICO-8:
EX - 809 (11/16) | TU - 803 (11/16)
Primary Cards:
American Express EveryDay - $20,000 (10/14)
Discover it - $23,000 (2/14)
AU on Barclay Sallie Mae - $10,000 (8/15)
plus several store accounts of varying usefulness now

Gamma
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Re: Talking to family about Credit cards.

Postby Gamma » Thu Oct 08, 2015 6:01 pm

JonE wrote:Everyone in my family is flat ass broke, and has had horrible experiences with credit. A few relatives hit a good patch in the credit world, applied for 5-6 different cards, racked up balances, and are now in a Money Management program paying all the balances off.

I've had better luck than anyone in the family, 3 credit cards, a new car loan, and paying down balances. I'd like to get 2-3 more cards and maybe drop one or two current ones, then stop there.

You pretty much explained my experience as well.

My parents were awful when it came to money management and had no extra cash in case there was an emergency. They would only pay the minimum in credit card payments and ended up going bankrupt with many banks. They also had no idea credit card rewards existed until I showed them redemption checks/gift cards I would get in the mail. Now I handle my whole family's finance.

Kevin86475391
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Re: Talking to family about Credit cards.

Postby Kevin86475391 » Thu Oct 08, 2015 6:47 pm

Personally, I tend to aggressively mind my own business when it comes to other people's finances - and sex lives, political or religious beliefs, eating or health habits, etc. I'll discuss these topics if they bring them up and are legitimately interested in having the conversation, but otherwise I just keep my mouth shut and let people do what they're going to do. I may *MAY* offer unsolicited advice if I'm particularly close with the person and see them making a big mistake, but if they're at all resistant to what I have to say, I just briefly state my piece and drop it.

That said, I obviously enjoy talking about credit cards and financial topics, and that's why I'm here at this forum. I assume that everyone weighing in is actively interested in having the discussion and wants other people's input. Generally, however, I never talk to family or friends about credit cards or finances.

Money tends to be a hot button subject - no matter how much or how little a person has. I know that personally speaking I can't abide anyone offering unsolicited feedback on how I spend my money or handle my finances. Indeed the only thing that'll piss me off as quick is if someone offers me unsolicited feedback on those other topics I mentioned above. Of course it's fair game if I bring it up here in the forum.


Vermonster wrote:I'm trying to help my brother out a little. He is living at home, college grad, waiting tables. He makes a boat load of cash and shoves it in a savings account. I think he has $25k in loans left and pays for everything with a debit card. He has no car, no rent, no insurance, ect. My parents aren't the best influence so I have been trying to help him out, explaining things and sending him information about cards. He is interested but hasn't taken the next step.


Personally, that doesn't sound too bad to me. At least he's saving it. A lot of conventional financial wisdom encourages people to build up very large, robust emergency funds before tackling debt or investing. Of course I also agree that now is a good time for him to begin building credit and establishing good credit habits.

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lobbythis
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Re: Talking to family about Credit cards.

Postby lobbythis » Fri Oct 09, 2015 1:33 am

Most of us are probably here because at some point we f*cked up and had to rebuild or we came from families who have no clue how to handle money and didn't want to end up like them. My family is a mixture of both.

As far as stories go and basic credit ignorance, I think maybe the worst one was one of my brother's friends thought that whatever your card limit is, is the amount of money you have to spend each month or year to keep it. That one blew my mind.

Gamma
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Re: Talking to family about Credit cards.

Postby Gamma » Fri Oct 09, 2015 1:52 am

lobbythis wrote:Most of us are probably here because at some point we f*cked up and had to rebuild or we came from families who have no clue how to handle money and didn't want to end up like them. My family is a mixture of both.

As far as stories go and basic credit ignorance, I think maybe the worst one was one of my brother's friends thought that whatever your card limit is, is the amount of money you have to spend each month or year to keep it. That one blew my mind.

Wow, now that's funny lol

jcarte29
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Re: Talking to family about Credit cards.

Postby jcarte29 » Fri Oct 09, 2015 9:00 am

Vattené wrote:My parents are very financially responsible, and conservative. I don't think they've ever financed a car - always save up beforehand and pay cash. I'd like to get to that point someday, but I did finance a car about a year and a half ago. They have a high aversion to credit cards, too. I've tried to explain the benefits, since I know they'd be the type to always PIF, but they'll have none of it.




This is my Family and I, almost word for word. My parents are living in a paid off home, with paid off cars (only one of which was financed), and when I was first off to college and my own way, I somehow thought I had finances and credit figured out, only to mess it up. My Dad bailed me out once but it wasn't a pleasant conversation LOL. I now talk to him all the time about my credit, and share my successes, and that's been really cool to get that assurance from him that I "figured it out." He is a retired CPA after all, so he used to handle million dollar budgets and books, and now I'm a Finance Manager for a Chevrolet dealership, so the easiest way for me to keep my finances straight is witness how bad one can make his/hers LOL.

All jokes aside, the combination of learning from my parents, and stumbling on my own, and climbing out of the "credit depths" (for real, my score used to be in the 4s) has set the table for the profile I have today.
Portfolio:
CITI Diamond Preferred $7,000 [06-16]
AMEX Platinum (Charge) [11-16]
AMEX EDay $12,000 [11-14]
Lowes Store $15,000 [4-14]
CSP VISA $6,000 [7-14]
GM MC $9,000 [9-14]
AAdvantage Red MC $10,350 [10-14]
Discover IT $4,500 [03-15]
Chase Marriott VISA $5,000 [04-15]
Cap One Quick $2,600[4-10]



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